10 Tips for Writing Fan Fiction or Granny Weatherwax in 'No Game of Chance'.

Romantic Friday Writers have hosted another great writing prompt. To write up to 1,000 words of fan fiction into a romantic scene. I'm always suggesting writers try genres outside their comfort level. I'm not strong with the romantic scenes (and you'll discover that hasn't changed yet) and I've never written fan-fiction, so I figured the exercise would test me. 

What are the rules of writing fan fiction? Here's a few:

1. Remember the characters have already existed elsewhere. You can put them into a new situation or setting, but you can't change their past (unless you introduce a Doctor and TARDIS, then you probably can).
2. Know the voice of your character. Don't try writing about a famous character you've never read or studied. Learn them. Become an expert. Fans will know if Ron Weasley speaks out of character.
3. Study your setting. Not just the layout, but the feel, the mood of the setting.
4. Try to keep to the writing style. You don't have to exactly keep the genre (although fans will appreciate it if you do) but don't do a serious drama based on characters from a comedy. That's not the type of fiction the fans are after.
5. Add a little something. Despite what I said in number 4, you should add a little touch of your own style to the piece. Otherwise readers may as well just stick with the original text.
6. Share! There will be fans who will get a lot of entertainment from reading their favourite characters.
7. Toughen your skin. Die-hard fans may love your work, but some may hate it because you've dared to toy with their beloved characters. Don't take it personally. It really is them, not you.
8. Cite the original work. Be open and let people know who you stole your characters from. Don't take credit for someone else's work, otherwise it's not fan-fiction, but a sneaky form of plagiarism. Some people like to use a disclaimer (there's some debate over wether this is helpful or not). You can find an example here: http://www.ehow.com/how_8532096_write-disclaimer-fan-fiction.html
9. If it's erotic fan-fiction, warn the reader. And if you're taking characters from a children's novel for erotic fiction, be very very careful. You may spark anger from the original author (or their lawyers). Parody is legal, but it could still be a pain.
10. Have fun! Fan-ficiton is for enjoyment. Don't try to live up to the original author, or prove yourself better, just have some fun while you strengthen your writing skills. I had a real laugh writing my scene between Granny Weatherwax and Death.

If you've still a moment and want a giggle on me, here is my fan-fiction based on characters from Terry Pratchett's Discworld series. 

Disclaimer: I do not own Discworld or any of the characters in this story. They are owned by Terry Pratchett. It's hard to believe any mortal could own Granny Weatherwax, but I believe her and Sir Pratchett have an understanding. This story was written for my own perverse fun and I shall not profit from it in any way (a little like my own writing then).

The prompt was to be a romance scene between famous lovers, but I may have wandered off from that idea, not sooo romantic, but hey, there is the suggestion of almost nudity. Shudder.

If you're one of those poor people who've never read Terry Pratchett, but you're curious, these are the characters I nicked, um borrowed, okay nicked, from Pratchett (click on them to see their Wikipedia page):

Nanny Ogg

Granny Weatherwax

Death

No Game of Chance

'New wrap?' Nanny Ogg ogled the soft black fabric replacing the worn battered coat usually draped about Granny Weatherwax’s shoulders.

'No it ate’nt.'

'Now you mention it, I do remember you wearing it once or twice before.' 

'No you don’t, you remember me wearing it many times before.'

'Uh huh.' Nanny Ogg nodded, but when Granny turned she leaned in with a pair of shears drawn from her knickers (where she keeps everything she needs) and snipped off a price tag dangling down Granny’s bony back. Always better not to argue with Granny, or you’d likely find yourself wanderin' the forest void of memory, or craving shell-fish even though you’re allergic, or… well, it was just best not to.

Granny paused at the door. Just a moment, but long enough to show a mix of smugness, sadness and nostalgia in the crinkling of her eyes. Strange combination, but Granny was the oldest witch to ever live, and she’d plenty of time to master these unusual amalgamations, like her infamous 'mischievous-amusement, gleeful-hunger mingled with disappointing resolve to kill you' gaze.

Then her knobby hand turned the… knob and she was off. At this time of night? Granny claimed to be a traditional witch, but she couldn’t abide late nights. Nanny Ogg peered up at the grandfather clock (who’d once been a young wizard). Its hands inched close to twelve. They wobbled with fear, because although Granny insisted it be set to gong at midnight, it would infuriate her if it woke her. Only wood and mechanics now, still, the clock retained enough memory to fear aggravating the old crone.

'She looks like she’s got a date with destiny,’ Nanny Ogg confided to the trembling clock.

'Oh I wouldn’t call 'im that,' Granny Weatherwax mused as she approached the old barn up the hill from the cottage. There was no point questioning how Granny could hear a mumble from the other side of the property and yet not respond to the calling of her name up close. Sometimes whispers were just louder than everyday talk. Like his whispers. Oh she knew he was coming and she knew what he wanted.

Granny lit every lamp until they flickered brilliantly. Good. Strong lighting was very important for this rendezvous.

She sat at the small fold-up table and smoothed her hand over the iron-hard grey bun. Not a hair out of place (it wouldn’t dare). She pinched her cheeks and the last few surviving capillaries cracked.

I may not 'ave the curves and complexion of a young woman, but I’ve me own allure. She was wrong. There were curves. Just not in the right direction.

She didn’t hear his arrival, but felt it.

'Esmerelda Weatherwax?' A deep voice resonated through Granny’s bones.

She didn’t turn. Wasn’t quite ready to gaze into that face. She knew what she would see, or wouldn’t see.

'Call me Granny, or Esme if you must.'

'Uh, alright, Granny Weatherwax?' but the theatrical air of impending doom was lost on the second attempt.

'You’re late.'

'It’s been a busy night.' His voice echoed everywhere and nowhere.

'Ave a seat.' Granny waved to the chair opposite.

'We should be going—'

'Come on, said yerself you’ve had a busy night, rest a little.’

'I… uh… thank you.' Death smoothed his robes and sat. 'Now Granny, you’ve had a long life, don’t you think it’s time you came along… peacefully?'

'No. I don’t.' She wiggled a gnarly finger at the place where his face should be. 'You’ve been around longer, I reckon you know the world needs people like me. I’ve still got a lot to do.'

Death sighed. 'I don’t make the rules Granny—'

'No but you can bloody well break 'em.'

The elderly were always the hardest, they could be so stubborn. 'I can offer you a challenge, that’s the best I can do.'

'I know.'

'It’s not really a chance, I never lose.'

'I pick the game?'

'Yes.'

'Good.' Granny reached into her carpet bag, pulled out a deck of cards and started shuffling. The cards flipped and arched through the air then were skillfully dispersed.

'Poker Granny?'

'Strip poker.' She winked.

He shuddered.

Just as the sun began to push pink and orange through the sky, Nanny Ogg knocked on Granny’s door. No answer. She went in. Granny wasn’t there. She stepped out again  and peered up and down the lane. Nothing. She turned her gaze up the hill to the old barn. Nothing. Wait. The door was open and there was a flicker of lanterns in the dim morning light.

Nanny Ogg hitched up her skirt and hopped from foot to foot through the long grass in a straight line for the barn. Just as she arrived huffing, a figure emerged. Or didn’t. Or he did emerge, but he wasn’t there. He most definitely wasn’t there and he was grasping his bundled black robes. He looked guiltily at Nanny Ogg, or didn’t, and hurried on his way.

Nanny stepped into the brightly lit barn just in time to see Granny doing up the clasp of her brassiere. 

'Don’t you knock?'

'Um, sorry Granny, it’s only, was that Death leaving just now?

Granny chuckled. 'Yep, don’t think he’ll be back for a while.'

'He come for you?'

'Tried to, but I bested him.'

Nanny Ogg helped Granny into her wrap—it was still brisk out. 'But how? Death can’t be beat at any game.'

Granny wore a smile combining knowing, victory and gas. 'Yep. But he didn’t want to win this one.'

Nanny Ogg saw Granny snatch up the cards and it all came together. 'Ooh, you’re a sinful old hag Granny.'

'I still ate’nt dead.' And Granny winked.

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Writing for Reluctant Readers (and getting them to read!), Part One

I wrote My Zombie Dog with reluctant readers in mind. I had plenty in my classroom to motivate me. I wanted to share with you all the advice and help I've found for reluctant readers. There is so much information available, I've split this into two posts, here is part one:

Children's literacy is important to me. Although I was an early reader devouring adult novels from a young age, I'm well aware that many kids struggle to catch on to the reading bug. There can be many reasons for this, but I've come across many kids who don't read because they feel they're not very good at it (which could stem from not enough practice or from a reading/literacy/sight disorder). Nobody enjoys pursuing activities they're not good at. This can be a bit of a cycle when more practice can help improve reading technique and lead towards reading enjoyment, but lack of interest/enjoyment leads to not practicing.

If you want to write for reluctant readers (and they're not just boys), or you want to find suitable books for your reluctant reader, here are some suggestions I've found valuable:

Fast paced books

Kids want stuff to happen in their books. Not just metaphorical stuff, thinking, planning, reflecting--they want the protagonist to DO stuff. Take action, make things happen. How many scenes involve the main character running? Really running for their life?

Daniel X by James Patterson - kid gets gut-shot. I know, you think this is disturbing, but this kid is an alien with super-healing powers and boys just love the fighting action in this novel.

Humour

Who doesn't like to laugh? The best part is kids like all sorts of humour. If you don't think you can come up with the witty one-liners, try some slapstick humour. There are rules to writing humour (you want your character to sound funny, not cruel). If you want more tips on funny characters, see a previous post J is for Jester.
The Fourth Stall by Chris Rylander is a parody of The Godfather. I like this concept because kids get a funny story, but are introduced to a more advanced story.

Mystery

I've found this usually appeals to girls more than boys. They like a story they can solve before the protagonist does. The Maggie Brooklyn Mystery series books are short, easy to solve and have dogs in them. Kids like dogs.

Familiarity

Most avid readers wouldn't dream of watching the film before reading the book, but for kids who find novels daunting, previous knowledge of the plot, character intentions, and even visual aids for setting, can help them settle into a novel. Although Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton may be a bit advanced for most kids, you can now get action series books set in the world of Jurassic Park. Watch the film, then read the book?

Short chapters

Keeping chapters short and using chapter numbers (not just titles) allows kids to quickly progress through the story and be able to measure their success ('Wow, I'm up to Chapter 7 already!'). James Patterson is a master at this technique.

Short Stories
This can be a great way to introduce kids to reading without the commitment of a full novel. My kids both loved Chris Priestley's Uncle Montague's Tales of Terror. Short and scary is a good combination! (You can read their review at Paper Dolls)

Now you've just got to get them to read...

Novalties

Lenny's World covered an awesome program involving kids reading to dogs. Specially trained dogs listen to kids reading books. Reading aloud helps a child develop their reading skills, as it's easy to miss words when you read to yourself. To save kids the anguish of reading in front of a parent or teacher, try getting them to read to their pet. Dogs don't judge.

Visit Lenny's post here: Reading To Dogs

Alice in Zombieland might give the dog nightmares Matilda!

I'll have lots more tips on writing for reluctant readers (and getting them to read) next week in part two! Do you have any reluctant readers at home? Any tips on how you trick/coerce/bribe them to read?

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J is for Jester

Readers like the bad boy more than the 'nice guy'. There's another character that wins us all over - The Jester.

The Jester, or the Fool is a traditional character that adds wit to a story. Their purpose is not only for laughs though, they are often pertinent to the progress of the narrative. Shakespeare's jesters were traditional political humorists, it was their job to keep the King grounded by mocking his political decisions (much like comedians do for politicians today - like The Chasers show). But what if you're not by nature a comedian? Is it hard to write humour? I think it's no harder or easier than writing any style you're not used to (my weak-writing is in romance). So what type of humour should you employ?

The one-liners.

The witty character that is always coming up with quick one-liners. Sometimes these remarks are at the expense of others, this makes the character seem a little heartless. Cordelia from Buffy or Dr House from House are examples. There's two ways you can deal with that; make the receiver of the wit deserve the line, or, make your witty one-liner character get their just deserts at some stage. This is the Trickster character, everything he does is for his own amusement.

The fool.

He's there for us to laugh at. He gets it wrong, but monumentally wrong. He's goofy and harmless, but at some stage in the story, despite all our assumptions of this character, he will actually help the situation where no one else could. No one will be more surprised than the fool. Think Ron Weasley from Harry Potter, or Morgan from Chuck.

The scenario.

Sometimes life is funny. We get ourselves into things that seem so absurd that we can laugh at them latter, these make great novel moments. You can draw on family stories or your own to create a humorous situation. 

For example, I don't swear, well, not the really bad words anyway. While at Uni, I took a course called Psychobiology of Sex, mostly it was about monkeys and alpha-males, but a little touched on the language we humans use. We were asked to write down all the names we knew, including swear words and slang for the female anatomy. Some of mine just used the first letter, followed by dashes. The teacher asked me to read my list. OMG. My face went red and I just read out the first letters. The teacher pushed me to read out the C word. No way. She kept at me and insisted it was just a word. She said it several times. No way. Next, she got the rest of the class to chant the word so I could join in. No way. This went on painfully for about 5 minutes, with the whole class chanting C..., C..., C... I kept seeing students walking past our open door and wondered what they must think of the situation. It was bizarre, like a weird dream where you realise you have a test for a subject you don't know and you're naked. Anyway, it was weird enough to be funny.

Humour can reveal an oddity in what we accept day to day. It can be used in fiction as a way of mocking itself (Pretty Little Liars had a scene in the woods with four scared teens, a branch cracks and a girl says to the others, 'Did you hear that?' This happens all the time in movies, but this time, one says "Well, yeah, I'm standing right next to you."). It can also break the tension, it's very common after a fright for people to laugh, it's our body's way of using up all that adrenaline. Humour is a good way of introducing the unexpected. Plus, humour just makes stories fun. (Click on the pic to read a funny)

Here are some more links to help you with writing the funny:

Make Your Writing Funny - A great post on All Freelance Wrting, with specific examples. I found this most helpful when trying to funny-up one of my characters.

Building Characters with Jung - One of my previous posts, includes a chart of character types and what their motivations are.

Top Ten Tips for Writing Humour - A few ideas for you to play with.

Write on the Funny - Gives some funny scenarios.

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